I shit you not

A lot of my job is corresponding with clients in Japan and China. Because I am fluent in neither Mandarin nor Japanese, I am frequently reduced to using Babel Fish to ascertain what a client needs/is trying to communicate.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the most recent and easily the funniest translation I have ever had.

Milk well way You have taken care. It is Helen Keller's case, but it was
difficult to take the illumination of the thing which after all is details and
this person of the picture this time as for Helen Keller the judgement that went
down from Dentsu it is not used. Very much we applying the number of hands,
excuse it was not. In addition when something it is, we ask may.

Spinning around

Ooops, sorry to Terry for missing his final night at Pony.
[The excuse, in case you care, is that I had to stay awake until nearly 5pm today to wait on the maintenance guy to fix our bathroom fan. That's a whole 3 hours past my bedtime--my late, late bedtime even.]
I'm sure his set was great--now let's just hope that he can find a gig somewhere else soon, cuz I need to hear some old tracks blasted loud.
Any news on Pony re-opening somewhere else?

And, finally, after a long, long absence, OKDJ makes a tepid return to the 1's and 2's. (Or, to the MixMeister Pro, to be more precise.)

This is my latest mix and I just wanted to put it out there, to get back in the habit of making mixes. I think it falls below vols. 3, 7, 8, 9, & 10, but the more I listen to it, the more I like it.

OKDJ vol. 11

Violent Group (Disco Version) - Lindstrom
Goblin City (Holy Ghost! Disco Dub) - Panthers
Luna (Tadeo remix) - Dusty Kid
Read My Mind a capella - Metro Area
Read My Mind - Metro Area
Parage - Justus Kohncke
Hypnotic Tango - My Mine (Thanks again to Terry for his great blog that supplied this track)
He Not In - Chicken Lips
Bonafied Lovin (Jori Hulkkonnen Mix) - Chromeo
Oh Superman - M.A.N.D.Y. & Booka Shade
2 Fast 4 U - Lopazz

I hope you like it well enough.

Conversations at 8508

Isn't it annoying when someone gets on the bus and opens the window above them, but they're not the one who's getting the cold winter air blown directly into their face, its all the people behind them?

Yes. Very annoying, and it happened to me today.

Queer Film Blog-a-thon

This post is part of Queering the Apparatus' Queer Film Blog-a-Thon.

Well, it has arrived, and, as per usual, I put it off to the last minute. So, here is a product that is far lesser than I would like to submit, but what can ya do? I had planned to make it pop-up-video style, but procrastination has turned it into the worst kind of cut. There aren't even any transitions! Oh no!
Still, it contains some of the film's beuatiful images (and some fool yammering on). Enjoy!

Oh, and check out Phil's great post, too!

Ain't no need to be the victim of obsession

I've wanted to know who performs this song for so long (well, since about November of '05). I always thought it would be kind of useless to ask here on my blog. I just play the whole mix for music enthusiasts and ask casually when the final track comes on, "Do you have any idea who this is?" Invariably the answer is nope.

It is, in my mind, one of those perfect tracks. The strings sit far enough back that you only fleetingly think of disco. The lyrics are brilliant. I don't know why, but songs about infatuation have always resonated with me--from The Carpenter's "Superstar" to Sarach McLachlan's "Possession". Really, though, this song is about the absolutely perfect percussion (highlighted by the synth bassline), especially by the time we get to verse.

So, now that I've found like, 2 of the best music bloggers on the 'sphere (and Seattlites to boot), I'm offering it up to them. Maybe their ridiculously deep crates, virtual or otherwise, contains this song.
Sean, Terry, any ideas?

Mystery Track

Oh, if you haven't checked out their blogs, do so RIGHT NOW! There's SO much great music on both of them. Sean has 2 mixes on his site that have been getting tons of play at the house lately. Everyone I've met in the past month has been forced to listen to Man 2 Man's "Male Stripper." That's one of those perfect, kitschy tracks that doesn't have tons of ideas, but the ones that it does have sit just right.

One last thing, you guys do know that you can download the admittedly paltry selection of tunes from the sidebar, right? I'll try to throw more stuff in there from time to time. Even if it is stuff like a cover of St. Elmo's Fire and an old Olivia Newton-John track. If you hover over the track, it will give you the details. There's also a down arrow that you can click on to d/l.

That is all. Lovely Thursday to each of you.

The Bronx is up and the Battery's down

I'm so glad I have a good friend in New York who lets me stink up her pad for a couple days a year. It makes visiting New York so much more affordable. I can't imagine, for example, staying in New Jersey and bussing into the city every morning. That would be so gauche.


I flew in on JetBlue which is still my airline of choice. I left right after work and landed around 10:30 PM New York time. Each seat has their own DirecTV, so I watched 30 Rock and The Office as we landed. First night in the city consisted of a Schnack courtesy of Tennille's knowledge, and sleep courtesy of Tennille's aero bed.


My first full day in the city, I visited my company's office on 6th Ave. They were really nice and very modern. I spent about an hour talking to people with whom I had only ever corresponded via e-mail. Then I went shopping. Nowhere too exciting--just H&M. Seattle will finally have ours in the spring. Then I grabbed some lunch at Better Burger. The burger was good--not great what I really enjoyed was the flavored ketchups. They had a curry flavored one and my favorite, a cajun flavored one. Then I went back to Brooklyn for a disco nap.



That night Tennille's friends Keith and Neil met us for drinks and dinner. You can't go to the first bar we went to because that night was its final night. Plus, I don't remember the name. Ledi maybe. Anyway, then it was off for Indian food at the Brick Lane Curry House. I love me some Indian food. I better burn going in and coming out, if you catch my drift. This is the place to go for that kind of food, apparently. They have a Phaal that they make you give a verbal disclaimer freeing them from any physical or emotional damage. I was feeling dangerous, but I couldn't do it. Instead, I got a vindaloo that I wanted to be *spicy*. Instead it was tepid. That's ok, though, it was really good--as were the fried cauliflower appetizer things.



Keith and Neil couldn't hang, so Tennille and I headed to the Annex for Ruff Club. Upstairs they were playing dance music bangers and downstairs was all your favorite tracks from the 80's. I liked the vibe of the place. Or, more accurately, it was a Friday night and the people there weren't pissing me off.



Saturday was the big day. The day intended for drinking. And drink we did. I was supposed to meet Glenn at Toast, but I don't know how to ride the subway and after a couple missed attempts, we eventually met by Green Papaya way up north.



Glenn was almost entirely how I had imagined him. He took me to Beard Papa's where we had vanilla cream puffs and a savory one that had bacon and eggs. Delish. Then it was to Chickpea for our real lunch. Once again, delightful. Topics of conversation ranged from lasik eye surgery to Battlestar Galactica, New York to Hawaii. Glenn is just as affable as his blog would lead you to believe and I'm so glad he had time to waste with me.


We met up with Jeff, whom I had never met but frequently read, and Tennille at the Film Archive for the premiere of Skull and Bones. I thought the movie was really funny if not a little choppy. It follows in the long line of queer cinema from movies like Sins of the Fleshapoids to Hey, Happy! Lots of its subject matter is there to make your squirm, and you probably would be if you weren't laughing at the non-existent production values. Expect a more thorough review soon.

The four of us attended the after party at the Urge across the street. Jeff had me in stitches. Part of the conversation went like this:

Jeff: We met at a Lebanese restaurant.

Me: A lesbian restaurant? Really? I can't even imagine what they serve there.

Jeff: (waits a beat) Tacos.

Glenn had a party to attend so he had to leave, but the three of us remaining continued our drinking binge. Tom and Jerry's was the next stop. Tennille stole a rubber rat from the Halloween decorations. We played Candyland and we got a pizza from Two Boots. Damn, that was some good pizza.
Two of Jeff's friends met us there. Turns out, one of them writes a blog--and I read it on a regular basis. Hey George!
Tennille and I parted ways with the gays--they were headed to the Gay and Lesbian Center for a dance and we were headed to the village for pedicures. 'Cause isn't that what you do when you've had too much to drink?

Sarah, my pedicurist was amazing. She called me crazy multiple times and asked if I was sleepless in Seattle. Then as a special present to me, she painted hearts on my big toes. Check it.

A couple more bars and finally we headed back to Brooklyn to hear Keith spin a lovely set at Sputnik. We almost made it back to Tennille's but had to stop at Moonshine first. You remember Moonshine? Its where I was raped by bulldogs on my last visit. It provided our final drinks for the (ahem) early morning and we had late night bites delievered there.
I know we were drunk because there were tears.

So, the only thing we HAD to do the whole time was go to Xanadu on Sunday. Ah, a hungover matinee performace. I can't think of a better show to see while battling the urge to hurl and sweating out the previous day's drinking than Xanadu.
It was everything that I hope a musical is--funny, short (no intermission), sing-along-able, and starring an unbearably dreamy guy in cutoffs (and later satin hotpants). A little about Cheyenne Jackson, the hunky lead, he got his acting start right here in Seattle.
And if you think that you're above Xanadu, both The New Yorker and the New York Times loved it.
When I saw it, I kept thinking how Jimbo reacted to the show. Truthfully, I can't believe he liked it, but I'm glad he did.

After the show, we headed back to Brooklyn for a quiet night of recovery. Of course, as with most trips to New York, it wasn't complete until I randomly ran into an old friend. This time, it was Edward.

Don't my toes look pretty?


They're still painted like that and when I took my socks off at the gym the other day, I was mortified. I think everyone in the locker room noticed (how pretty I am).

Toward the end

On my flight home from Texas, I sat in the window seat with a middle-aged woman in the center seat and a seventh grade girl in the aisle seat.

I was tired. I knew I would be sleeping the entire flight so I thought I would be kind and let the little girl use my DS. Advance Wars: Dual Strike. Nope. Brain Age. No stylus. Tetris. Kids today don't get Tetris. That left Diddy Kong Racing.

I put in the cartridge and handed the device over.

She excitedly took it and brandished it to her jealous older brother across the aisle.

The game started and my save game character came up on the screen: Ball Sack.

(more to come)